Me and Myself
The clouds enveloped the heart of a child in the corner of the page . " Hi," I said to him friendly . His face grave , his attit...
The clouds enveloped the heart of a child in the corner of the page .
" Hi," I said to him friendly . His face grave , his attitude is very closed . He shifted his body turned to me so I approached him unconscious . As if there's something taboo seemed to me .
" You what? " Question came out of my mouth .
He only answered with silence , without a word .
He looked at me for a moment , then back down to the ground , throwing the leaves are dried to a vacant look in between her legs .
" I was disappointed with the Lord ! "I was stunned to hear his statement .
" Why did He created me like this, not like the other kids ? " Tone of protest was so thick there .
" During my 21 years of travel , I always confined by the rules of my parents . They have always imposing their will to me , " a tinge of sadness in her face visible jeals .
" I'M DEAD !"
" My life is not ' live ' , I'm bored !" Feels hujaman knife at the end of the story .
For a moment I saw him . Physically, he is very well-maintained . Her skin clean , nice clothes . Starkly contrasts with soul , dark and gloomy . Blank gaze , invisible soul , buried deep in the bottom of the heart .
" You look happy , " she looked at me with envious eyes .
" Did God ever let you down too ? I like a natural . "
I smiled to hear the question . Try to guess what he wants answers from the question .
" Yes , God never let me down . Repeatedly. "
" I never felt God was not fair to me , at peciptaanku . In fact I often swear at him in my prayers . Expletive unstoppable , it just came in my prayers to Him at that time . "
" And the question ' Why God ? ' Has always been an endless rhetoric in it . "
" And then ? "
I smiled to hear the question .
" You know what ? God has his own way I'm acting out . "
"I really can not complain to him . I am the property , body and soul are all hers . He has the prerogative to determine every inch of my life . "
" I was just a play , but had no sense . "
" So , it's useless to God I continue to protest . I can not peek scenario holds. I do not know , play what I play next . It could be that I would be a millionaire , or even a prisoner in custody "
" It is reasonable that if I criticize God , thinking that he is not wise . But still my mind was , he made it. I will not be able to reach him . Until whenever . "
The boy was watching me deeper , from head to shoes she browse closely .
" Hey, you look a lot like me !" He said without hesitation .
" Your shoes , your clothes , and bahkaaan .... Face? ! " He gasped .
" May I see your hands , is there a scar there ? " Hands trying to grab me .
Tuk ! ! He stumble the impenetrable layers, can not grab me .
"You know I was you. We are the same person. The difference of us i just point of view about life " .
" Hi," I said to him friendly . His face grave , his attitude is very closed . He shifted his body turned to me so I approached him unconscious . As if there's something taboo seemed to me .
" You what? " Question came out of my mouth .
He only answered with silence , without a word .
He looked at me for a moment , then back down to the ground , throwing the leaves are dried to a vacant look in between her legs .
" I was disappointed with the Lord ! "I was stunned to hear his statement .
" Why did He created me like this, not like the other kids ? " Tone of protest was so thick there .
" During my 21 years of travel , I always confined by the rules of my parents . They have always imposing their will to me , " a tinge of sadness in her face visible jeals .
" I'M DEAD !"
" My life is not ' live ' , I'm bored !" Feels hujaman knife at the end of the story .
For a moment I saw him . Physically, he is very well-maintained . Her skin clean , nice clothes . Starkly contrasts with soul , dark and gloomy . Blank gaze , invisible soul , buried deep in the bottom of the heart .
****
" You look happy , " she looked at me with envious eyes .
" Did God ever let you down too ? I like a natural . "
I smiled to hear the question . Try to guess what he wants answers from the question .
" Yes , God never let me down . Repeatedly. "
" I never felt God was not fair to me , at peciptaanku . In fact I often swear at him in my prayers . Expletive unstoppable , it just came in my prayers to Him at that time . "
" And the question ' Why God ? ' Has always been an endless rhetoric in it . "
" And then ? "
I smiled to hear the question .
" You know what ? God has his own way I'm acting out . "
"I really can not complain to him . I am the property , body and soul are all hers . He has the prerogative to determine every inch of my life . "
" I was just a play , but had no sense . "
" So , it's useless to God I continue to protest . I can not peek scenario holds. I do not know , play what I play next . It could be that I would be a millionaire , or even a prisoner in custody "
" It is reasonable that if I criticize God , thinking that he is not wise . But still my mind was , he made it. I will not be able to reach him . Until whenever . "
The boy was watching me deeper , from head to shoes she browse closely .
" Hey, you look a lot like me !" He said without hesitation .
" Your shoes , your clothes , and bahkaaan .... Face? ! " He gasped .
" May I see your hands , is there a scar there ? " Hands trying to grab me .
Tuk ! ! He stumble the impenetrable layers, can not grab me .
"You know I was you. We are the same person. The difference of us i just point of view about life " .
Candra Aji , August 2011
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